I met this really good looking guy from Australia tonight. We met in Silom. He was nice. We sat at a bar in the Soi and people watched. Afterwards we walked around for a little bit. I enjoyed that part of the night.

Later we went to a night club. One of those places where the music is way too loud and there are so many people you can barely move. I didn’t enjoy that part of the night so much. I hung around much longer than expected. Mainly because the Australian was cute and I wanted to make out with someone. I really like the idea of sleeping next to someone. Hopefully cuddling for a while. I haven’t done that in such a long time. I miss feeling close to someone like that.

In the past the bar has always gotten me very riled up. I’d leave and just feel terrible. That really didn’t happen to me tonight. Yes, I wish I’d left with the Australian, but I’m not devastated for having left alone. It’s ok. What an unfamiliar feeling. Hmm.

Gratitude List:
Hot Aussies
Recognizing growth
Sleeping in a room all by myself

I flew back to Bkk from Hong Kong yesterday. I was so sad to leave, but grateful to have had such a wonderful experience there. It’s such a beautiful, vibrant city and I met so many amazing people during the week I was there. It gave me a lot to think about and certainly provided some much needed clarity and direction to my current situation.

I’m planning to find a job teaching in China. Perhaps Shenzhen because it’s close to HK and I could go there on the weekends, but I’d consider other places in China as well. It feels a lot more exotic than Bkk does which I really love. Hopefully things will fall into place pretty quickly. I don’t want to fall into the trap of being stuck here and not making progress towards anything. I don’t think I will. I’m meeting with a guy today who has been doing freelance work. He’s going to explain it all to me and if it’s something I can do on my own I totally will. I think I’d like to get a job teaching in an actual school, too, for the support and to grow as a teacher (not to mention the work visa so I can stay in the country!). I’m looking forward to today.

I also did my second day of morning pages. I didn’t do them at all while in HK. I’m really looking forward to working through this book.

Gratitude List:
Morning pages
A clearer path forward
Being able to tell myself (and understand!) it’s all going to be ok

I’m bummed that tonight is my very last night in Hong Kong. I’ve had a really great time exploring this city and getting to know all of the wonderful people that I’ve met along the way. Today I hung out with E who is staying in my room. We went to the Chi Lin Nunnery which was gorgeous and ate some lunch. Sat in massage chairs at the mall and tried out the latest weight loss product. Afterwards we went to the ladies market and bought a few things. It was great to spend the day with her just talking about life and laughing. I like laughing a lot.

We also went out to some bars afterwards. It was fun, despite a few problems finding where we wanted to go. It’ll be sad to leave tomorrow, but hopefully I’ll be back before I know it.

Gratitude List:
E
Hong Kong
Delicious soft shell crab

I had such an inspiring day. I took a trip out to Lantau Island and saw the Big Buddha statue. The island itself was just gorgeous and the tram up remarkably beautiful. There were a ton of hiking trails all over the island which I’d just love to explore more. The more I think about it, the more I feel I should figure out how to live here. I just love exploring this vibrant city. It’s like the skyscrapers end and then nature begins. It’s just wonderful.

Gratitude List:
Feeling close to God
Plans coming into focus
An exhausting day exploring this wonderful area

I can’t help but feel like something is going on. Something beneath the surface that I haven’t quite grasped or become fully aware of. I catch glimpses of it here and there; I can feel it growing, changing. It’s certainly gotten my full attention, but full comprehension hasn’t quite arrived yet. Sometimes I feel as though I’m on the path of discovering nothing, But in it’s discovery, all will be found and understood.

S and E left today. We are all going our separate ways. Well, they are going their separate ways and I’m staying here for a few more days. I’m so lucky to have met them. Today we went to Stanley Beach and wandered around this chic area of Hong Kong. I had so much fun with the two of them. M also proved to be a great tour guide. I’m grateful to have hung out with him today as well.

Gratitude List:
New old friends
Old new friends
synchronicity

3:30 am… Much better time to go to bed than the 6 am that was last night.

I had the most remarkable day. It wasn’t so much what we did as the company I did it with. Macau was great to visit, but England and Switzerland are really what made it special. I’m so grateful to be able to spend the day laughing and hanging out with them. They are both just so great. And really, I’d underestimated how therapeutic a day of laughing and goofing off can be. Just awesome.

Gratitude list:
England
Switzerland
Laughing my ass off and being silly like usual

Switzerland is so cute. He’s really ignited this passion inside me to find one of my own – this latent desire that hasn’t been seen for a few months. It’s nice to feel in touch with that desire again. Now I just have to stay positive…. Just stay positive.

Gratitude List:
Wanting again
An extremely enjoyable sushi search of Hong Kong at 2 am
Another day to explore this fabulous city

I got the best surprise ever last night. Yesterday’s post was all about heartbreak and loss, but when I got back to my room in the hostel I noticed a note on my bed. It was from Switzerland man! I was able to connect with him and we met up today and spent all day exploring the city. I had a great time with him. We bought tickets for the tour bus and spent the day being driven around the city. It was proved to be a great way to explore and I enjoyed spending time with him. I’m pretty sure he’s straight, but he’s not mentioned women at all so it’s possible (although certainly not likely) that he might swing my way. If nothing else, spending time with him has definitely given me a much clearer idea of what I do want. Basically, a boyfriend.

Gratitude List:
Making new friends
Beautiful, vibrant Hong Kong
Hope I’ll someday find a man to call my own

I’m in Hong Kong.

Sitting in the terminal at BKK waiting to get on my flight I notice this extremely attractive guy traveling alone.

We get on the plane. Surprisingly, he’s not seated next to me. He happens to be seated one seat behind me. I’m sitting in the front of a row near the window with a ton of leg room and no one sitting next to me. Until he asks the flight attendant to move to the seat next to mine which is open. Perfect.

Not only is he adorable beyond comprehension, but he’s really nice, too. Ugh. We talk for a while; he’s Swiss, but he studied in LA for a couple semesters and has since been in Shanghai working and studying architecture. It doesn’t take me 10 minutes to decide not only is he perfect, but we were meant to be together. Forever. I start planning our future lives together.

When the plane lands I ask him to show me into town. We get everything ready and take the train. First we find a hostel he was thinking about staying in, but it’s full so we go to the one where I’ve got a room booked. They do have one for me, but can only accommodate him for 1 night. They show me to my room and I tell him I’ll come right back out and see him. When I get back he’s gone. Haven’t seen him since.

I don’t know why my higher power does these things to me. I mean really, sometimes it just feels cruel and unfair. I haven’t been thinking about dating lately because I feel so gross about how I look and don’t really want to date right now. Couple that with the fact that I’m surrounded by Asians and no men I’m particularly interested in dating and I’ve basically stopped thinking about it entirely. And then bam! I sit next to and get to know that guy. I feel like one of those women who’s clock is ticking who keeps seeing babies everywhere and just wants one more than anything. Or, perhaps, it was meant as some motivational fodder so I’ll get my ducks in a row and possibly be able to date. Maybe it’s a sign my guy is coming. I guess I’ll keep the hope and stick with that. Yeah, let’s stick with that.

Gratitude List:
A renewed interest in the men around me (this could also fall under the “curse” category)
Getting to explore Hong Kong for a bit tonight
A yummy meal filled with things I’ve never eaten before

I’ve had this book, The Artist’s Way, for a couple of years now. I keep meaning to start using it. I moved it from Minneapolis to New Jersey and then Thailand. Last night I finally started reading it. I’ve heard really great things about the book, but just haven’t made the time to read it (or do the exercises). This morning I started doing the morning exercise that is suggested everyone do. After reading the introduction of the book it really gave me hope that I will find it to be beneficial. I’m really hoping it’ll provide some much needed clarity and hopefully a healthy dose of motivation.

So I’ve been taking a magnesium supplement. It makes me tired as hell and I’ve been sleeping excessively since I started taking it – like up to 12 hours a night. I hate sleeping that much. It always brings me back to growing up and the time well into my 20s when I had the hardest time regulating my sleep. I don’t seem to have as much difficulty anymore which I’m super grateful for. Last night I didn’t get as much sleep as I’d have liked, but it wasn’t a struggle to get out of bed. It was much better than it’s been for the last week.

I’m sitting in a cab in the way to the airport now. Hopefully the Bangkok traffic won’t make it too horrible to get there. I should have plenty of time, but I’d rather not get stressed about it. I’m really excited to have a week in Hong Kong exploring. Woohoo!

Gratitude List:
An easier morning
Hope for some creative motivation
Leaving Thailand for the first time in 3 months!