It’s late. I’m tired and I want to go to bed.

I hung out with M and A all night. We are definitely no longer party animals. Tonight we went to a mediocre sushi place for dinner and afterwards stopped by the grocery store (for candy, or course!). Once we got home we sat around for a while and then went up to the attic to steam clean the carpeting which I promised M I would do before leaving. It was a super fun night. Getting old is awesome!

M(e) isn’t home yet. She’s supposed to be giving me a ride to the airport in a few hours. I wish I’d gone to bed earlier, but the time got away from me and I put off packing until it was late. I offered to go pick her up from the train station, but then she texted something about missing her train and that she’d take another and we should wait to hear from her. We still haven’t heard from her. I’d like to pick her up and help out since she offered to drive me to the airport tomorrow, but I also really want to go to bed.

I met a guy I’ve known for a while in Newark today. I went to his house and we made out for a while and then we got something dinner. I enjoyed making out. I didn’t want it to go any further than that today because I’ve known him a couple years and, although we’re not good friends, I’d like to wait to fool around until I’m more comfortable with my body and being around him. He’s super sweet. I’m not sure if there’s really much potential for that to go anywhere, but I’m willing to explore things and find out.

Ok, time to wake up M(a) and tell her I’m going to bed. I’m excited to go to Minnesota tomorrow, but also sad to be leaving NJ.

M(e) just texted. I’m going to pick her up.

Gratitude List:
A super fun night with good friends
Flying to MN tomorrow
Enjoying my time on the East Coast for now

I went into the city again today.  I’ve gone into the city for the past 4 days.  I’m exhausted right now and looking forward to having a more relaxing day tomorrow.  I’m planning to meet a friend in the early afternoon and then hang out in Jersey for my last night.  It’s going to be strange to leave, but I’m excited to be in Minnesota and to get to see my friends and family there.

I went to a Reiki clinic tonight.  It was good.  I haven’t given a treatment to anyone but myself for a long time.  I enjoyed it.  It was also really nice to receive a treatment.  I wish I got more Reiki treatments.

I’m so ready for bed.  I’ll have to pack tomorrow which shouldn’t be too bad.  I’ll be coming back out here in not too long so I’m going to be tempted to leave what I can so that I have more room in my suitcase when I come back.  I’m sure I’ll figure that out.

I almost forgot to mention – I met a nice girl at the Reiki thing.  She is interesting and I can see myself becoming good friends with her when I’m back in this area.  It’s always nice to make new friends.

Gratitude List:

A new friend

Giving and receiving a Reiki treatment

A date tomorrow?

I went and saw Hedwig tonight and it was fantastic. Andrew met me. We were lucky to get tickets. We were going to meet for the lottery drawing, but he got held up at work so it was just me. My name wasn’t called because I’m the most unlucky person imaginable. After the drawing, I sat down not too far from the theater to wait for Andrew. He sent me a text asking where I was. I walked back to the front and see him talking to some guy. I come to find out the guy’s girlfriend can no longer make the show so he offers to give us his tickets. We gave him money and a little tip and he purchased the tickets for us. Andrew is definitely the only person that could win the lottery tickets without even entering. He’s so lucky!

I texted a few friends earlier and let them know I’ll be around. I’m so excited to see people I haven’t seen in a long time. It’s going to be so much fun. Even though I have so many great friends in Minneapolis, I still think I’ll decide to come back out here and stay. I’ve had a great time bumming around with Andrew lately and there’s just so much fun stuff to see and do in this city. I want to call it my home, at least for a while.

Gratitude List:
A wonderful show
A really fun night
Chipotle for dinner

I got to sleep in this morning which is always appreciated. I did my morning things and then went into the city. I met A and we got lunch and then went to MOMA. After we got lottery tickets to a show on Broadway. It was fun to see a show. All in all a good day.

The woman sitting next to us at the show was from Chicago so I talked to her for a little while. I still think I’ll end up out here, but I could swerve and go to Chicago. I have a much better support network here. A has been fun to hang out with and he’s living in the city. I could totally see more of him and do things if I was living out here. It’s fun to hang out with M and M, but it’s also nice to have a single, gay friend in the city as well. I don’t know how everything is going to fall into place, but it really seems like the NYC area is the right place for me. I figure I can give it a shot and if it doesn’t work out or I don’t like it I’ll just leave. It’s not going to be expensive for me to move out here – I’ll basically just pack up a suitcase and maybe some other things my mom can send to me. Or, I’ll fly back for Christmas with an empty suitcase and then when come back with it full of stuff from home. Really, when I think about it right now I can’t imagine moving to Chicago. I don’t know anyone there since C isn’t even there right now and I’d have to find a place to live, a job, and I’m not even sure I’d like it. This area would just be so much simpler.

I had intended on staying in NJ tomorrow, but I’m feeling this push from myself to go into the city and make the most of my limited time out here. I know I’ll be back in just a few weeks, but I want to go into the city and do as much as possible now. A and I might try to get tickets to another show tomorrow. It would be really fun to go. I’m going to see how I Feel in the afternoon about whether I want to take the train into the city. I went the last two days and I know I’ll be going tomorrow. It would be fun. There are still a few things I’d really like to do in the city, like walk around Central Park and check out The Met.

Gratitude List:
Finding some clarity surrounding my future plans
Feeling much more like my old self
Getting to hang out with fun friends and laugh a lot

I went into the city today. I went to an art museum and then met Prince at a diner nearby. We ate burgers with french fries and onion rings. After, we went to Home Depot where he bought some paint and blinds. It was nice. I helped him get everything back to his new apartment and then I went to see a show. It was fun hanging out with him.

I’m planning to go into the city tomorrow as well. I’m meeting A at MoMA and then we’ll probably do something in the evening, too. I’m not sure what. I suppose we could try to get tickets to a broadway show. That would be fun! I’ll bring it up to him tomorrow and see how he feels about it. It would be easy enough to try to get lottery tickets to something. I’m not even sure what’s playing right now. I’ll have to check it out.

I’m enjoying being out here, but I’m also looking forward to being back in Minnesota for a little while. I found myself really looking forward to it at one point today. It will be great to be back – even if it’s only for a few weeks. Minnesota is my home and will always hold a special place in my heart.

Gratitude List:
Looking forward to being back in MN
A nice day in the city
Making the most of my last few days out East (for now!)

Today was not very interesting. I enjoyed it, for the most part. We got out of the house which is an improvement over yesterday. We went to lunch at Outback and afterwards did a whole bunch of errands. Well, mostly shopping. We went to Marshall’s and TJ Maxx. I had hoped to find a new shirt or two since I really don’t have much in the way of long sleeved shirts or sweaters to wear. I didn’t find anything I felt like spending my money on. It’s a little unfortunate because I’ve been wearing the same clothes for like 3 days in a row now. Oh well.

I’m going into the city tomorrow. I don’t know what I’ll do, but I’ll figure something out. I still haven’t spent much time wandering around Central Park. I also feel like I should definitely go to The Met before leaving this area. The Met always has cool stuff.

I found a drawing I was working on when I lived here last. It’s not too bad. I don’t think I’ll finish it, but I bought a large sketchpad that I could use to start another drawing. I haven’t drawn anything in a long time. I’d like to, though. I miss it. I don’t know why I haven’t spent any time drawing lately. It would be a nice thing to do with the TV on as background noise. Hmm.

I ate a little bit better today than yesterday. Mostly because I didn’t spend my entire day sitting next to a large bowl filled with candy. We were gone from the house for so many hours it really cut down on the amount of junk I ate. I did still eat plenty of junk. I’m waiting until I get back to MN to start exercising again. I don’t have many options here other than running outside which I hate to do.

I’ve definitely gotten plenty bored this last week. It’s great to be back, but it would be really nice to have something more to do. Not to mention an income.

Gratitude List:
A nice day of just hanging out
Getting to sleep in this morning
A relaxing weekend with old friends

I didn’t leave the house all day. I sat inside mostly watching tv and eating candy. The day wasn’t bad or anything, but I have that lethargic, fatigued feeling that comes from not doing anything that is even remotely mentally stimulating all day. I wish I had even just gone out for a walk or something. I think tomorrow I’ll make sure to get out. Even if it’s just to walk to the store. I can’t sit inside all day.

It was nice to hang out and be around friends. That I’m grateful for. I also spent a little bit of time looking at jobs and things like that online. I found a couple I could apply for, but I have to decide if I’m going to stay out in this area or not first. I suppose I could just apply. There was one that was very similar to my finance job in Minneapolis. I really don’t think I’d like it, but it would be nice to make some money. It’s been a long time since I had money coming in. I’m going to quickly rack up more credit card debt being out here and not working. It’s so easy to put things on my credit card and it’s not a good thing, at all.

Gratitude List:
A very relaxing day
Feeling more like my old self and having fun
A rainy, cold day that was best spent indoors

I got to drive a uhaul truck all around Astoria today. I helped a friend move. It was kind of fun. If I hadn’t helped him I would not have done much of anything all day. It was great to actually do something and fun to see a friend. I got some ideas on how moving to this area could work – if it’s what I decide to pursue.

I’m so tired now. I’ve eaten candy all day long. We ordered thai food when I got back to NJ. I feel stuffed and gross right now. I’ve made a little progress at eating better since getting here, but I still have a long way to go. I should really try to have a sugar free day tomorrow. Today I got up and had fun sized candy bars for breakfast. When I start my day like that it’s a given I’m going to eat like shit for the rest of the day. Hopefully I’ll put more of an effort into it tomorrow.

Gratitude List:
Getting to check out Astoria and see a good friend
Idea for future plans
Being useful

I’m on the train back to Delhi! I wish I had a reservation at a nice hotel. I think what I’ll do is go to a cheap place in Paraganj (sp?) and pay for a room for just a night. I can then look around and decide what to do. If the hotel or guesthouse I find is decent I’ll just stay there. If it’s terrible or I want something nicer I’ll find a different place to go. I think the rooms I was looking at might be more expensive because it includes nights on the weekend. If I stay somewhere cheap Saturday night I might be able to find a deal for something else on Sunday or Monday. I could also take a bus to Shimla which I’ve heard is more relaxed. Maybe what I’ll do is stay in Delhi Saturday and then go to Shimla Sunday night and come back on Wednesday. Hmm. That could be cool.

I’d also like to do something nice for Ramesh. I could see if we can get a bus to Agra to see the Taj Mahal someday before I leave. If I stay in Delhi I’ll see if he’s interested in something like that. A bus to Agra (or the trains) really can’t be very expensive. I appreciate all the help he gave me when I first got to Delhi. I really don’t want to stay at his place when I’m back tomorrow, but I would like to see him and hang out.

I’m really excited to go home. I don’t know what I’ll do from here, but something amazing beyond my wildest dreams is going to materialize. I just know it is. I’m excited to feel more like the person I was when I left, but a whole person now. I’ve let go of so much and grown and changed in ways I think will really benefit me. I can’t wait to be the new and improved me.

I’m so glad my India adventure will be over soon. My abroad adventure is going to be over soon. Wow. Strange, but good, too.

Gratitude List:
Being on what could be my final train ride in India
Less than a week to go!
Having options and exploring those options

Well… I slept in. I woke up around 11:30 this morning. I think it was worth it. I seem to be sleeping too few hours followed by too many. It’s not a great system I have, but hopefully it’ll smooth out. Tomorrow I am going to get up, go into the city and help a friend move. It’ll be nice to have something to do.

I’ve done nothing today. M came home because she wasn’t feeling well. We ended up watching tv for hours. I seldom watch tv and it’s been such a long time since I spent an excessive number of hours doing it. I always feel just wiped out and brain dead after watching tv for a few hours. Sure, I’ll stare at my computer screen all day, but watching tv is another story. I really need to try and avoid doing it like I did today. What a waste. The day was pretty relaxing. So that’s at least good.

Gratitude List:
A relaxing day
Being reminded that spending the day watching tv is never a good thing
Taking a look at some opportunities online and scoping out what’s out there