I wish that decisions were easier. I found out the NJ job may be falling into place much sooner than I anticipated. I thought I would have a while to settle into Mpls and my new apartment, but now I’m not so sure. I’m still planning to sign the lease on my apartment tomorrow. If I don’t they’ll just keep my security deposit anyway. I figure I’m better off signing the lease and then only staying a month before finding someone else to take it over since everything is still so tentative. I’m hoping to connect with my potential new boss tomorrow and ask him a few questions about everything.

I do feel like a chump leaving this job I started 4 weeks ago so soon, but this week has been so hard. Yesterday I was basically done and found it really hard to stay positive. My emotions went negative and I lost control of them which wasn’t great fun. I was given another task that is even more boring than the one I was previously given. Ugh. I have realized I can’t do this kind of work long term, but the two days so far this week have made me really question if I can even do it short term. Today was better than yesterday, but still not very good. I’m going to sleep on it and find out more information tomorrow. There is a part of me that’s really excited to be living closer to NYC again. I love that city. Kind of.

I enjoyed my class tonight. It was nice to see Chris and I feel like I learned quite a bit. I do really want to pursue this writing craft. I want to learn more about it and get much better at constructing stories. I think it’s something I could do quite well at with some focus and attention. It’s definitely something I want to take some more classes on, either here or in NJ.

Gratitude List:

Getting to spend a good amount of time meditating today

Clarity, even if it’s truths and realizations I don’t actually want to own up to

Hump day is tomorrow!