I met my mom this morning. We got some lunch and then bummed around in Maple Grove and had a nice time doing some shopping. It’s nice to be back in MN and to see my family. I know I was just here, but I am glad that I’ll be around for a few days. It would be nice to live closer so that I could see them easily and more often. Unfortunately I just don’t think the growth opportunities exist in Minneapolis. Otherwise I’d move back there.

I looked at myself in the mirror and Josh’s today before taking a shower. I think I’m looking better. I’m still not super happy with how I look, but it wasn’t until today that I finally felt like I’m making progress and was able to see it. I’ll get there. I just have to give it some more time. I’ve also been feeling a very strong desire to actually do some dating. I want a guy in my life. I want it to be more than just a one night stand. I want someone I can count on to be there for me. Someone I can confide in and trust. Definitely someone I can have sex with regularly and cuddle with a lot. I want those things and I’m willing to put myself out of my comfort zone to make that happen. I don’t have much of any faith in the apps. I think when I get back to NJ I’ll join one of the dating websites. It’ll be good for me. I’m ready to make an earnest effort towards dating. It’s time.

I’d really like to meet someone in person. I’ll have to start doing even more stuff around the city and try meeting people. I know there’s a great guy out there for me. It’ll be fun to find him.

Gratitude List:

The desire to change

Being back at my parents’ house for a few days

Having fun playing cards

A good workout