While walking to work today I had an interesting thought/revelation. I live in a world that’s currently uninhabited. There are people around me, but I don’t see them as alive or awake. I’m not even sure I am. In fact, I don’t think that I am. I think that I’m headed in that direction, but I’ve been wrong in the past. And, like I figured out a decade ago, dig deep enough and the only thing I’ll find is nothing, but that nothing is what’s beautiful.

I have moments, like this morning, where my thoughts seem to be on a different plane than normal. Like they are being directed and guided from a different source. I’m still myself, but I feel like I’m a part of the world on a different scale and level than ever before in the past. Like I’m more than just me. They are still my thoughts and I’m still having them, but they’re originating from somewhere I’m not familiar with. I found this morning’s walk to work to be a little unsettling, actually. I enjoy a change in perspective and the ability to see the world through a different lens, but it’s also unfamiliar to enter that mode.

I had a dream last night. In the dream I was playing cards with some other people and when it came my turn to play I told them they weren’t going to believe it. I had been dealt a whole bunch of aces – like 8 of them. Way more than are in an actual deck.

I’m grateful to be another day closer to being done with this job. I can’t wait to leave China and move on with my life. I’m enjoying myself right now, but Istanbul is going to be more amazing than I can fathom. Woot woot!