I felt such a connection to spirit this morning. Like everything was working out just fine and that I didn’t have to worry about how I’m going to support myself going forward when this job ends. I had such faith that I would work at the freelance writing and things would fall into place. At some point today, I lost that connected feeling. I started to feel doubt that maybe things won’t work out; that maybe I should take another teaching job in Shanghai for a while to earn some money and be in a better financial situation. One thing I need to do is keep reminding myself that as long as I follow my heart everything else will work out. My heart says it’s time to leave China and strike off to a new place with new goals. As difficult as it is to trust that things will work out, especially when it comes to the financial aspect of it all, I’ve got to maintain hope and the belief that as long as I follow my heart all else will be taken care of. Something will pop up. It might not be doing what I expected or hoped it would, but something will pop up. Another teaching job is not the way for me to go.

I took some time to look at the writing website and started to feel overwhelmed. Like there is just so much to do and I don’t want to do it. It’s really not that difficult though. The steps and process are pretty straightforward. It just involves me putting myself out there and taking a lot of risks.

I’m tired and planning to head to bed early. Maybe I will get up in the morning and look at the freelance writing stuff again. I’m grateful that I got done with 1 of my 3 presentations this week. I’m also really looking forward to seeing my parents on Sunday. I can’t believe that it’s only a few days away.