Yesterday was fun. I wandered around the city, took a couple boat rides down the river and checked out two temples. Wat Arun and wat pho (the reclining Buddha) were both very neat to see. I really enjoyed the boat rides, too! Floating down the river is a neat way to see the city.

I met a guy on grindr last night. He’s in Bkk for work and lives in New York. I went to his hotel and we hung out and talked for a while. I enjoyed talking to him and getting his perspective on Bkk. We ended up going out to eat and then went out to see a lady boy show afterwards. The lady boy show was great! It was at this club in the gay silom area of Bkk. All of the performers looked really good. We stuck around the club for quite a while after the show. I’m really not much of a club person, but it was good to check out and something I’d much rather do with someone else than by myself. We also danced for a while… Dancing is really just one of many things I’m not good at. All in all it was a fun night. After the club he invited me back up to his hotel room and said I could stay the night. I haven’t been intimate with anyone really since B and it’s something I’ve missed a lot. I crave a deeper connection with someone – to feel and to hold them. We did end up fooling around and I enjoyed it, but in that moment I hated B for running away from me and making himself emotionally unavailable. I really do want a deeper, more meaningful connection with someone. I hope I find that someday. I feel like I’m ready for it.

Gratitude List:
Being able to explore Bkk
Making it to a meeting
A filling meal